the title is september 26 2007
You dont seem to understand why.. why I dont want it to be this way.
Its not that I dont want it to be that way, it is just that there are some things that I cannot bear to come into contact with. I know the intentions are decent. I know.. but please, dont be egocentric..
Its only now that I have grasped the real reason why I feel odd whenever these intentions come into place. Let me elucidate further. Yes I want to be THE friend that I feel u want me to be. What I dont want is the sentiment I undergo in this time of intention inducing situations.
.. resentment. A feeling a friend does not desire to feel. Comment – if there is animosity, then tell it, rather that being a die hard synthetic manufacturer. The hell.. I feel that u release the fury on that intention preoccupied lady. why not tell it to me and let me justify everything. But I guess, thatll be hard for someone who can hardly accept criticisms. But I really do hope that sympathy is still a preference.
.. truth is, I am a feeler. I dont crave for a treatment that is as if it is the same treatment that was before felt. The same treatment that u used to give me when we were still THE WE I long before desired -even though I didnt know it..- or am i just not used to you being that way to rag. im puzzled. I dont want to expect something that seems to be unattainable. I am a feeler. Thats why it hurts a lot.
.. agony. Be at least considerate. Whenever I experience being with the binary you, I feel devastated. Through my smile, I expose my pain. Through my radiant eyes I show my rage, through my word I show my rigidity. I am a phony. I hide the pain behind happiness. The hell.
Well, formally, I ended that past, and that past should be erased in eternity. For the sake of my best friend, I sacrificed my dignity. Be not my friend, because it is not supposed to be that way. After this, go back to reality. Go back to the usual and never see beyond that. Ahhhhhhh!!! I hate my stupidity!!! I have moved on!
But why are these tears running down on my damned, cursed face.
Friday, October 13, 2006
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