wahehe

Ralph saves the day!!

but cant save his day!!

Today is april hmmm… april 29.. yeah. Im watching pb ryt now.. they are currently resolving their differences, maricris and bea.. gawd.. it feels sooo awful.. is this the effect of too much attachment? Or carrying the burden, affliction misery of other people..?? maybe.. this has been me.. the great confidant. The great counselor. The great listener . at least I can call myself a real friend.. though their misery becomes my misery too, I wont leave them in hostility. I am ralph. That’s me. Im a friend.. whew.. so what happened to me these past few days??

April 16-17- burbank outing.. it was interesting.. it was not the best though but I had fun.. it was a different outing.. not the usual swimming

April 18, 2007- I and my friends went to manila memorial to visit the humble lair of my deceased classmate.. she was my first in everything.. hehe.. then we went somewhere else to settle some things....

April 19, 2007- I can remember nothing.. aww.. ph and leslie made me furious. I found myself caught in a deception game and gave me 2^nd thoughts on holding on to that pledge.. woo.. they really got me. And up to now, it still irritates and bothers me.. wahaha.. this was a Thursday and I was supposed to go to up with thea and neph. And waw.. there was ph.. I tried to be nice.. hehe.. after that, everything eventually got ok.

April 20, 2007- hmm.. Friday.. I think i attended the cotillion practice of thea

April 23, 2007- overnyt at thea's haws for her avp

April 24, 2007- nothing really special.. it was just freaky.. hope they will be ok.. sooner. padolina awting that turned into a moa malling

april 25, 2007- einstein outing. i had fun though i felt weird since i am not intimately close with all of the einstein people.

April 26, 2007- we had a practice again at thea’s haws gawd.. haha

Tinatamad nq.. nxt time nlng.

a really bad day..

exactly 7 am, i woke up, tnx to the alarm clock sponsored by cm. i got up to prepare myself. i dont want to be late for our choir practice. (i have never been on time on our practices.) so there, i took a bath for ten minutes. search for anything to wear, gaaahdd.. i dont have pants to wear anymore, i have used each one of them, then i saw this old rugged pants in my bros closet. i knida did not like it since it looks too old.. but who would mind anyway, so i took it. then, i realized that i have used all my shirts too!! good thing i found my brown shirt in my bros closet .. our clothes sometimes gets mixed up.. and that makes us panic whenever we need one. so there, i wore that plain brown shirt and went off. it was already 8 am.. i was expecting a heavy traffic since 8 am is a "rush hour". so there, yeah, got myself stucked in a traffic in zapote. then i rode a jeepney to alabang to get a las pinas bus ( i swore to god never to ride a cavite bus again ever since i arrived at skul around 10 am because of insufficient public transportation vehicles and heavy traffic) that happened during our graduation practices. so there, i tried to wait for a bus, but gaaaahd!! 20 mins have passed and all the buses were refusing to give me a ride since all of them are fully loaded, so i rode a jeepney going to baclaran. then got jammed again in a traffic at coastal road. gaaawd, it was so hot!! so i asked the driver to drop me at mia road, then i rode a tas trans bus. woo.. that was soo tiring. guess what, i arrived at scool around 9 30 pm. gaawd, all the hardships and effort to come to school on time got wasted. argghh.. so that started my day...

after it was even worse. the practice was kinda, hmmm, okay in the morning session, but after that, gaaahhd, i got irritated maybe it wsa because of the fan, or the fact that we were not doin anything, or because i was not able to internalize everything we ought to sing, or maybe i was expecting it to be done by 12. the fact that i brought so much things and prepared so much for our badminton session got me irritated. singit lang ( we ate at a carinderia near our skul, it was cheap and i got everybody game for it) so there, the choir practice finished. then i was expecting that leslie, ph, nino and i would still play badminton( i am getting better evry session!!) but then, it turned out that we would just sit still, wait for god to end this world and go home. so there, we went home, while waiting for a bus, i suddenly felt this scourging feeling inside my stomach. gaad, it really hurts, like ulcer or something.. so i asked them if we could eat at kfc. so there we ate... then everything got worse.. i drank too much rootbeer and made my condition worse.. i was not able to finish my food.. that costs 90 php.. gaaahhdd!! i need to save money... then after that.. wooo... the dramatic concerto started.. with ph then with leslie.. woo. i got irritated... my stomach was really killing me then they started to go mellowdramatic. i saw that last phrse.. i really got irritated.. ralph. feeling close nman ako. woo.. i really hate those dramatic phrases... just like dani.. who told guiwo that, feeling close nman ako kay ralph.. argghh..watafrend tlga.. when i thought that we really were friends, and we really were close enough to be called friends. that makes me feel that i am also a "feeling close" human being to them.. then leslie cried.. it was my fault.. woo.. i shoud not have said that.. i was too insensitive.. so.. i got really depressed.. then it rained.. we waited for it to stop.. i was not really attacehd with reality then.. i was not with myself.. so there, after that, we went home..

we first went to lrt to drop nino then we rode a bus then leslie left at buendia. then i slept, i was too tired.. and it was too cold in that freakn bus. i was dreaming of pokemon.. haha... i was traumatized by the pokemon epi i saw in gma that morning.. so there, everything ash and misty were saying was about balut.. kwek kwek.. haha.. ph woke me up from that nice dream, zapote na pla.. so i was not really that awke then.. i was half awake actually.. parang lasing lang tpos "huh, zapote na?? ahh..baba na ako, paalam" half awake, i crossed the road.. then i saw i light.. it was so bright.. beeeeeeep!! woah.. it almost hit me. gawd.. good thing it stopped "putang ina mo! magpapakamatay kb??" the driver told me.. i can still remember, a marron lancer.. i think.. woo.. i almost died.. gawd..

then i went home.. went ot the cr.. my eyes started to shake. then haha, slapped myself.. im still alive..

i was not really conscious today.. i was not with myself... too many problems.. too much frustrations.. confusion.. guen? gawd.. everything is not sinking in.. overload.... i need..... something..

friends. old and new.

i am happy with my friends. i am sad.. i got only a few. tnx to u.

royce, for supporting me when i thought everything will

Collapse. I really am thankful. For texting me though it was already 1 am in the morning. Tnx.. for the kiss.. haha.. I love kissing u.. haha

Leslie.. for always being there when I am down.. sori too for my dramatic texts,, haha.. but still, tnx for everything.. for trusting me with ur secrets.. thanks for tripping me, haha..

Guiwo.. for my bestfriend, who was there for four straight years.. thank u for all the moments we shared, for the simple tap.. for believing in what I can do. For always being there.. for understanding me.. for trying so hard to fulfill my desires.. for always siding me in every problem I had.. for being such a good friend.. for all the concern.. I am really thankful to have a loyal bestfriend like u.

ronel.. though, I only just knew u.. I am thankful because u are very honest and open. I thank u for trusting me. Thank u for the badminton plays. Tnx for the advices. U are such a good friend.. tnx

dani.. tnx for always treating me.. haha though I have money.. thank u for being guiwos friend.. thank u for supporting me in all the adversities I face.. thank u for being us when we wat to see a movie. Thank u for lending me ur ps2.. thank u..

these are the people I am thankful for now.. these people whom I put my confidence with assurance.. where are the others.. I don’t know.. gone with the wind.. happy? Maybe..

April 8 kahapon. Its easter Sunday, esther day, ruffy nd esther day.. hehe.. good for them, woo… ngtagal cla for that long.. congrats!! Hehe.. seriously.. im happy for them.. hehe.. yes.. im sad.. pero ok lang un.. hehe

Gaya nga ng sabi nila.. new life.. haha, kelangan pa plan g easter Sunday para mgbagong buhay. Un. Ok na ako.. so wats next for me?? I don’t know.. just hoping for the best for me. Ill just go with the flow.

Ok. Nu b gnawa ko ngaun. Haha.. badminton with ph, nino at cm.. kapagod. Sayang c leslie, di sumama pero ok nman. Ndi ako naop eh. Un.. laro laro. Naligo lang ako sa pawis. Laro.. then.. may naalala ako.. c nino kc.. naalala ko c gxxx.. gawd.. gawd tlga.. saying lahat… malapit na bday nia… magdedebut na sana xa next year.. –sigh- I miss her.. T.T

Mark the day, april 18..

birthday?

I just turned seventeen.. gawd… it is sooo different.. I don’t feel like 17, I feel like 15!! Though I look 18 in my most exhausted moment in my life.. that is great!! Maybe, I don’t feel like 17 because I hardly felt my birthday.. gawd.. this is the 2nd to the worst bday I have ever had.. well, the first one was last year…

Why didn’t I feel my birthday. I was not able to clench the essence of my birthday due to my “laspag” mode last grad ball, and the grad ball itself. I was assigned to make the avp, (which I happily accepted and in fact I volunteered to make it) 31 hours. It took me that long. Our computer is such a shit.. it is so sluggish and ready for breakdown. I hate that don’t send thing on my screen, telling me that the program should close. I experienced it for more that ten times, so I had to start allover again my avp. Good thing, it has a recover mode implanted in its program. Woohhh.. I used two computers, onepc and one laptop. The problem with that laptop is it has a 539 mb space for storage. Gawd!!!whats with this computer!! It does not even have anything in it but there is only 500++ memory. So I have to do everything almost manually. I can actually put it in automatic mode but it will take ages before it finishes. So there, around 4 pm, I finished the avp without checking it or even, having a glimpse of the finished product..

Ok. Continuation. There, I was able to finish the avp around 3 pm.. after that, I got flustered, went to Robinsons immediately to buy a tie, but I found my self, looking for longsleeves. So my parents left me there, they went to my brother’s apartment to get my coat. Everything seems so impromptu. Adrenaline rush, I went directly to the department store, nothing was there, I went to lacoste, onesimus, bench?! Penshoppe?! Then I saw g2000! It was on sale!! I saw a stunning polo. It was black and sold for only 700 pesos! That was 30 percent off, so I immediately purchased it. It took me one and a half hour to find that polo. I matched it with my gray tie. I arrived at the hotel, wearing nothing but sheer house attire.. haha. I felt so poor then.. haha then I immediately got the keys of my room from the freaky lady at the frontdesk and in a flash, went to my room, washed, and got dressed. I looked good!!

Then the gradbol started,, they showed the avp, it was good.. I think everybody liked it. Then we danced.. I danced with jansot.. 5 songs.. (tinatamad na ako mgtype) I danced with esther.. it was the worst ever.. I was about to cry then.. good thing I am equipped with tear controlling device. So I was able to impede it from flowing intensely. Woo… there.. my day came. Ding dong. 12 am na. some greetd me.. some did not.. it was fine. So we celebrated my birthday ( coper) in our room, ate mcdo and slept. That was it. And left my pocket totally wrecked. Goodd… but then, when everybody was out, and as I was cleaning up the room coper left me to clean up, a sound of the bell suddenly chimed. I opened the door.. T.T all of the Einstein people went in, carrying a cake with them, singin me a happy birthday.. I was really touched.. I was about to burst out in tears.. pero nakakahiya un. Haha so, I controlled it once again. So there.. I was not able to absorb it fully. Haggard.. so then, we went to school for practice, then ate with the choir people. Then dani and guiwo bought me a ring.. it was good.. I liked it.. then I went home.. lost.. drained.. and went to sleep.. it was not the best birthday. Gloomy.. sad.. morbid!!! I hate u.. u ruined it.. ex.